Friday, May 28, 2010

when simple isn't simple

This past week (on top of work, a job interview, Rob being out of town, homework, etc.) we went through a heat wave and a dry spell - in May!!! Amazingly it feels and looks (grass is turning yellow) like August...

In the spirit of living a simple and sustainable (for ourselves and our planet) life, I decided that I would NOT turn on the a/c, and would water by hand (or watering can rather - I live with kids, making sure that I can't be misinterpreted is important!LOL). I did decide to drive to drop them off instead of bicycling..

It brings me to the point though that sometimes this simple life seems to complicate my life... watering the garden with what little water is left in the rain barrlels (one is already empty), hanging laundry, using a push mower and not using a/c isn't in any way faster or less work... it does make me feel rather heroic though and in the end many of these activities lend themselves to a kind of meditation. I've often said that hanging laundry is both a reminder and built-in proof that I DO have time to slow down... while living without a/c had the kids camping out in the downstairs living room where it was cooler - a real adventure that they were thrilled with...

so... simpler, not really but slower and more connected... yes... to each other and to the 'real world' outside which with a/c and clothes dryers and hoses and sprinklers can quite easily get shut out...

So I will continue to risk being the crazy lady on the block for the sake of living a more connected if not simpler, full life...

Monday, May 24, 2010

Life is complicated... keep it simple

Why is it that just when you think you might have simplified a bit more, accepted that you can't (at least happily and sanely) do everything and keep everyone around you going, and that you might just maybe need some help on some days... that Life hands you a complication?

So I've just admitted to chronic depression being part of who I am... to needing certain things to happen (or not) in my life for me to be grounded and happy (and there for others... like, oh, my kids for example) and feeling pretty darn proud of myself, when wham... life sends a complications. My uncle is doing poorly... 3.5 hours away (thank God for my mom and sister who life closer and are just so amazingly available to him)... and I find myself on call and feeling that all the simplifying I've done has just set me up for life getting complicated again... when I realize... that the reason I'll be able to deal with this with (hopefully) a modicum (love that word) of grace is in part BECAUSE my life is simpler and more honest ... and so I'll continue to slow down and simplify and accept (both myself and my limits and help)... because it's easier... and that's ok!

Friday, May 14, 2010

FulLife not Midlife...

Not Midlife
No crisis
Just lots
Of everything

Problem is
I don't want to have nothing
I just want to have the right thing
the right somebody
in my life

Here is my quest to do this...